Mother's Day

If you are a sensitive Mother, do not read this. What I'm gonna write pertains to MY mother only. This may trigger some.

When I was a child, my older brother would beat the shit out of me whenever he felt like it. Nobody protected me. I was always the blame for getting beat up. Dad said I had a big mouth and deserved to get beat and if I didn't stop crying he would threaten to spank me.

My mom who was also afraid to stand up to dear ole dad, never said a word. She never comforted me..NEVER!

Years later I'm a grown man. I have a good life, despite my upbringing.

I remember one time when I got ready to go to a school dance, I combed my hair differently. I went into the living room and mom laughed at me. I was crushed.

My version of a good mom, is one that will comfort me when I am hurting. One that will not ridicule me. She would help me to overcome my fears. Fix my boo boo's.

I wrote that mom was afraid of dad. I don't know how she put up with the verbal attacks. My dad treated her so badly. She is a battered wife. Not physically, but verbally and mentally. She's been his slave since the day they married.

I've written in the past that dad was my anti-role model. Mom is too. I wanted a wife that would stand on her own. A woman that was loving and caring. Strong enough to speak her mind, yet understanding.

Mixing the dad anti-role model and the mom anti-role model together, I took the best parts and combined them into my life. I didn't want to be my father and I didn't want a woman like mom.

Thankfully I was wise enough to know that a man should never treat a woman like the way dad does. The same goes for mom. A woman must protect her children if the father is absent...drunkenly absent.

Mom worked a 40 hour a week job. She had to come home and make dinner for 5 hungry children and dad. I admire her for that.

I understand now why the house was a mess. She was too tired to clean. I did my best to help. I remember one time when I was cleaning, the others were watching tv, I was sweeping the floor. When I got in front of the tv, I lingered there. That didn't work like I thought it would..I got beat up.

In conclusion, mom is older now. She has no children to feed. She never calls or emails. She is still a victim of abuse. I gotta hand it to her they are still together. I would've left his drunken ass years ago.

If you read this and were offended by it..I apologize. This is how I see and remember my mom.

I will be calling her later today to wish her a Happy Mother's day.