display of humaness

Is "humaness" a word. If not I apologize.

I got a call from my mom in Florida. Usually when she calls it's serious. She said my brother-in-law (Jim) had a heart attack. I said "omg! Which she responded by saying it was a "little heart attack." I reminded her that any heart attack isn't good..even the small ones.

I called my sister to offer any help I can. She stated that Jim has to have bypass surgery.
Debbie (my sister) wanted me to know because I'm the only sibling that cares about her. My two older brothers won't talk to her at all. Mike, my younger brother has no feelings for the family, with good reason.

I cried.

I cry for my family. It won't do them any good, but I have feelings and the rest don't.

Jim is 47. I'm 46. Thus the word humaness. I have had several deaths in the last few years. But the thought of Jim possibly passing scares me.

My dad in an effort to console me, made rude remarks about Jim. That's dear ole dad. He never said anything good about Jim or any of us for that matter.

My nephew isn't even Jim's child, but took him as his own. Dad would never do such a thing.
Oh man I'm looking at my own mortality. I wrote that "everything happens at precisely the right time."." Even this.

I weep. I weep because of the family drama.

Live, love, laugh, learn, listen,